it's only through the plant that a coffee bean can become anything

Do you know what I think is interesting? People’s perceptions of their own testimonies of how they came to Christ. Those who came to know Christ at an early age and never strayed from their faith tend to think their testimonies are boring. Those who lived through a lot of bad decisions and what’s known as “bad sin” (that has always seemed redundant to me, what sin isn’t bad?) always think of how much better it would have been to not have gone through all they did. Then there are those in the middle. They have pretty much always known Christ yet they did some not cool things or they have always been a great person yet didn’t come to Christ until a lot later in life.

It’s the middle group that always get me. The testimony is ever changing. Sometimes they dwell on the bad and make it seem as though they were saved from a life of complete darkness and horrible things. Other times they focus on the simple things that showed them God’s love that brought them to Him. This has always bothered me. I am pretty sure it bothers me so much because I am part of this group. After being with people and telling my story, I always get annoyed with myself if I have focused on the not so cool times. Why do I do that? Do I think it makes me cool? Does it make the person I am now seem so much better? I do it because I am trying to use my story to show how great God is to save me from that life. In reality, God doesn’t need my story to show His glory. I could totally just focus on all the simple love things He shows me and He would be glorified beyond comprehension.

It was in the times when I thought I was doing alright when God would yell at me. He would smack me in the face with all I am doing wrong when I would be in a place where I thought I was on track. It wasn’t when I was in the worst places of my life. If I am going to properly share my testimony, I need to re-evaluate and start focusing on how He brought me out of the garbage and not what the garbage was that He brought me out of. I need to show Who He is and not who I was or who I am now. Because without God, I am nothing. Without me, God is still God.